Guilt
by KimicThranduilion
Summary: Elladan feels guilty and is convinced he is guilty for many, many things. Another drabble based off a prompt by ThurinRanger - a companion piece to Vengeance. Disclaimer: I own nothing - it's all Tolkien's - I merely play with them.


**Guilt**

Elladan glanced across the clearing to the bush where Elrohir had concealed himself – he could hardly make him out even with his sharp eyesight. Elrohir had become good at this – far too good Elladan thought morosely.

He listened intently for another moment and he could hear them clearly, talking in their foul speech, sullying the peaceful night air with it. They would be here in roughly five minutes or so depending on whether or not the stupid creatures could stop themselves from picking fights with each other.

Elladan sighed softly to himself – he really wasn't in the mood for this right now. He hated arguing with Elrohir and Elladan was quite surprised the _yrch_ hadn't heard them – so intense had their argument been – Elrohir had been screaming near the end. But then again orcs weren't referred to as _Glamhoth_ for no reason, Elladan doubted they would have heard it if a herd of _Mûmakil_ had been dancing in the clearing, orcs were always caught up arguing amongst themselves.

Elladan shook his head and adjusted his position slightly, refusing to think of the Dark One's senseless minions a moment longer. That however led to his thoughts returning to more painful topics such as his twin. No that was not quite right for it wasn't Elrohir himself that caused Elladan pain but rather this dark vengefulness that seemed to take hold of him every time they rode out on errantry. Elrohir had asked him if he had forgotten, if he had forgotten everything that had led them this point. Of course he hadn't and he had meant it when he had sworn alongside Elrohir to avenge their _Naneth_ ; but he didn't like the cold, vengeful almost maniacal look Elrohir got in his eyes when they were fighting the _yrch_. He certainly hadn't liked what he had seen not too long ago – no matter the enemy they should be killed swiftly, cleanly and with dignity. Elves were better than that – his Elrohir was better than that.

But this Elrohir, the one's whose eyes had lit up when he heard the sounds of yet more _yrch_ , was not his Elrohir – and for this he felt guilty.

Oh yes Elladan was guilty of a great many things. It was his fault they had not reached their _Naneth_ in time - he had decided that he Elrohir ought to go hunting that day – by the time they had got back and scrambled to the Mountains it had been too late.

It was his fault Naruon was residing with _Mandos_ now. What kind of an _ellon_ was he to let a friend (albeit a great one) go in his stead? A poor one indeed. All Naruon had done to deserve his death on those cold mountains was to befriend him and Elrohir. It was his fault – he had been Naruon's captain after all – he had assigned him to the troop travelling with his mother. Guilty – he was guilty of Naruon's death and he hoped if they ever met again Naruon would be able to forgive him. It was only a very faint hope.

Guilty. It was his fault for giving in too easily to his _Naneth_ 's laughing claims that she did not need him and Elrohir to escort her to and from his _Daer-Naneth's_ lands. He was eldest he of course should have been there.

And now even now there was more guilt to be heaped upon him – for it was his fault that Elrohir, his dear, sweet, easy-going twin had been turned into a vengeful _ellon_ with a sword called _Hyandënóla_.

Guilt – Elladan was mired in it – he was a poor son, friend and brother. And he was guilty, guilty, guilty, guilty, so he had sworn his oath along with Elrohir. It was the least he could do – sure it was too little to late but if he could help in avenging his _Naneth_ then so be it.

He had sworn to clear the lands and great mountain ranges near his beautiful home of all _yrch_ – a great task indeed but still, thought Elladan sadly, still not great enough to ease his great guilt.

Elladan could hear them clearly now their hideous black speech grating on his ears. Elladan tightened his grip on _Nyérënehtar_ and prepared himself to take another tiny step towards assuaging his all-consuming guilt.

 **End.**

Yrch – Plural of orch – Sindarin for Orcs

Glamhoth – Din horde; yelling horde- Sindarin for Orcs

Mûmakil – Large creature resembling elephant used in battle by the Haradrim

Naneth – Mother

Ellon – Male elf

Daer-Naneth – Grandmother

Hyandënóla – (Quenya) Literally: I cleave heads; head cleaver Elrohir's broad sword

Nyérënehtar – (Quenya) Literally: Sorrow Slayer; Slayer of Sorrow Elladan's broad sword


End file.
